"The most wasted of all days is one without laughter." ~e e cummings

Saturday, March 7, 2015

runaway

I'm ready for spring.

Have I made that abundantly clear?


*****


My family has had a lot of togetherness lately. It's wonderful, of course, until it isn't. Snow days as bookends on either side of a family vacation have meant that the kids and I have endured nearly two weeks spent in very, very close quarters.

This is not difficult because I don't want to be with my kids. This is not difficult because I don't know how to keep my kids happily occupied at home. This is not difficult because we haven't had outside time (although we desperately need more that will come with spring). This is not difficult because my kids don't get along (although sometimes they don't). This is not difficult because my kids are little shits (although they certainly have their moments).

This is difficult because I am an introvert.

I need alone time.

I try to carve moments out of the day here and there....though I haven't had a true nap time lately, we do have daily Quiet Time, during which we non-nappers each have some time apart; reading, writing, or playing independently. When Sam comes home, I disappear behind my closed bedroom door for half an hour to write or do some yoga. But I needed more. By yesterday afternoon, after a particularly difficult day (and a particularly shitty attitude of a certain 5-year old...), I couldn't breathe.

"I'm going away tomorrow," I greeted Sam as he walked in from work. "I don't know where I'm going but I'll be out all morning."

"Stay out all day!" Sam countered, "We'll see you at dinner."

So I went.

I took the long way to town, blaring Sirius as I drove, singing (terribly) along with every song that came on. It's amazing that, with Mommy Brain affecting my ability to string sentences together, I have such solid lyric recall for so many mid-nineties hits. When I arrived, I walked through a couple of stores...taking my time more than I can with my toddler tagalong in tow. I browsed.

I'm at a cafe now and I just ate a lunch that I didn't prepare--a whole lunch! Not the leftovers from my kids' plates. I ate sitting down. I'm not going to wipe any hands or mouths, other than my own, and I won't have to finish chewing a bite while assisting a 3-year old on the potty in an Emergency Potty Situation.

It's been a great morning.

But I'm ready to go home. Sam took the kids to the library and I want to find out if Evan was able to find the third book in Rick Riordan's Kane Chronicle series. Did Max find some fairy books in the Rainbow Magic series that he hasn't read yet?

I miss them.

How strange.

Lesson Learned:

An introvert needs space. But this one doesn't need too much: Just an occasional morning runaway, then I'm craving their stories and snuggles. I think I'll linger here at this cafe just long enough to enjoy an uninterrupted cup of tea...and then it'll be time to run back home.

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