I had a few errands to run, none of which would have been fun with a Wild Thing in tow. So while Sam took the monkeys to the zoo, I headed out for a morning of shopping. (By the way, I can't write or say the word "shopping" without hearing Chris Rock say, "Women be shoppin'!" It's a problem.)
One of the stops required a trip to the mall to buy skinny maternity jeans (NOT an oxymoron) because I just can't have my favorite boots sit in my closet until next year. While at the mall, I, of course, popped into Gymboree to peek at their newborn girl clothes...because, well, I just couldn't help myself.
It was there that I realized that I just may be in over my head here.
As I was browsing, a mom pushing a less-than-one-year old baby girl in a stroller walked in. She very politely inquired of the sales clerk, "I'm looking for a hat for her that's sort of in-between fall and winter."
Moms of Boys: Did you know that there is such a thing as BETWEEN SEASON ACCESSORIES? Me neither. I waited for the clerk to look at the mom like she was the crazy person that I thought she was, but instead, she directed her over to a FULL RACK of fall/winter knit hats. The mom looked and said, mildly disappointedly, "Oh, I need something a little more neutral, her coat is red."
Moms of Boys: Did you know that the hat is supposed to MATCH THE COAT? Who cares?! The baby is not even ONE! Do people notice if the outerwear doesn't match the accessories?!
The clerk expressed her understanding of the mom's dilemma and directed her elsewhere: "Crazy 8, our sister store down the hall has an adorable black, white, and red knit hat. It is Too. Cute!" The mom responded, "Yeah....I was just there. It IS cute....but it doesn't match her other coat."
Moms of Boys: Did you know that you're supposed to have MORE THAN ONE COAT?! My boys each have a coat and a sweatshirt jacket. They have one hat and one pair of mittens. The hats don't necessarily match the coat/jacket and the coat/jacket is worn depending on the weather, not according to the outfit the child is wearing.
The mother picked up one of the "non-neutral" knit hats from the rack and said, "You know, I think I'll get them both."
Moms of Boys: Did you know that there are, apparently, different rules for girls?!
I started to panic so left the store empty-handed.
I did, however, walk into Crazy 8, which I've loved forever because it really does have the cutest boys' clothes, and I was anxious to see what the other half of the store held. As I was checking out with my adorable itty-bitty pink koala sleeper and Too Cute tiny pink hedgehog onesie/skirt/leggings set, the cashier smiled and asked, "Would you be interested in coordinating hairbows or accessories today?"
Unless I get busy learning the Rules For Girls, this poor baby is going to be the only little non-coordinating non-accessoried girl on the block. But at least she'll have two big brothers who will keep the perfectly matched, perfectly braided little girls from making any personal remarks.